


Better Than Me

by EvilValenStrife



Category: Degrassi
Genre: Forgive Me, I still love you all, It's so depressing, M/M, So much angst, angsty
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-31
Updated: 2014-12-31
Packaged: 2018-03-04 14:09:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 386
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3071036
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EvilValenStrife/pseuds/EvilValenStrife
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>But, if it means dragging you down, chaining you to this rock and damning you to putting up with me, I'll set you free...</p>
            </blockquote>





	Better Than Me

**Author's Note:**

> Author's Crap: So, I know we're all still reeling from Tuesday. I just figured that I would take this time to write a small little drabble on what was likely going through Miles' head. It's probably a jumbled up mess but, that is intentional. Miles' current thoughts are probably nowhere near organized. Germaican on tumblr did a great analysis of the current situation and, I spoke previously about Miles' harsh words to Tristan in the episodes before. Remember, there is always more than what's seen at first glance with Triles.

Eyes like a hurricane glittering with tears un-shed met my own with the harshest of glares. The anger, the frustration, the hurt. All the emotions welling up behind those thunderstorm eyes. They did always seem to grow darker when he was upset. As predicted, I knew what buttons to push. What to say, what to do.

_Yes, push him away..._

_No, don't leave me! I can't lose someone I care about again!_

_Don't let them see your weakness..._

_I don't wanna be alone!_

_He deserves much better than me. I'm worthless... I have to show him. Show him that I'm not worthy of him._

_I can't let you go!_

_But, if it means dragging you down, chaining you to this rock and damning you to putting up with me, I'll set you free..._

Right. These are my feelings. My true emotions I bury deep in my heart so that even I've forgotten them. Or, at least, I thought I had.

My thoughts twist and scramble, contrary at every turn leaving a discombobulated mess in its wake. But, isn't that what I am? The great tornado Miles Hollingsworth the Third that isn't satisfied until he destroys everything in his path?

But, not you. I will not allow myself to destroy you. If pushing you away, if making you see the real me is the only way, so be it.

"You are a terrible person."

_Yes._

"You use and abuse people, and one day you're gonna wake up and realize you have nobody."

_"All you ever do is manipulate everything!"_

"And I am so happy that I won't be there for that sad, sad day."

_No, don't let him see you waver..._

"Because I am so done."

_"Trust me. It's the last time."_

"Sayonara Miles Hollingsworth."

_"Until they get to know me, then they run for the hills..."_

Tristan's back turned and grew smaller as he stepped free of the vacant hall.

I don't know how much time has passed. Minutes? Seconds? I looked at the now abandoned spot where someone I truly cared about once stood and, with tears now falling freely down my cheeks, spoke barely above a whisper

"Goodbye Tristan..." And crumpled to the floor letting the tears that clung behind my eyes fall to the linoleum floor pitter-pattering like rain on a window pane.

**Author's Note:**

> Author's Crap: I'm so sorry I'm so depressing right now. I just had to write this because Miles feels that Tristan is too good for him. He knew exactly what he was doing on yesterday's episode. Forgive me for this sadness... I will write happier stuff soon though! Especially once school starts back up!


End file.
